The Tug of War
Click below to listen to the reach:
For this week’s reach, I would love to begin with these lyrics from a worship song I currently hold dearly:
In the morning, I will sing of how You love me
In the evening, I will bless Your name
It's amazing when I think of the way You saved me
Every breath I breathe is for Your praise
The song is titled, “What A Miracle” and it is one of nine that I have listened to every day for the past two weeks as I walk in the mornings, a two mile journey I like to call my time of walk & worship. During this 30-40 min exercise, I sing - pray - listen - and breathe deeply. If you looked at the gps that tracks my steps, it would appear as if I only walk in circles getting nowhere (as you can see in the photo below) — the truth is my soul has journeyed to a place beside still waters.
I find humor in the fact that, while I’m walking my heart rate increases — as always with any workout — but because my heart is working so hard, it doesn’t get to sit idly with opportunity to chit chat with my emotions. Jeremiah 17:9 speaks of how deceitful our hearts can be, and while some may find that scripture harsh…personally I agree.
So with my heart distracted in good ways, my mind and soul are able to focus on what is true, right and lovely — my Creator, my Savior, my Lord. And with every passing day, as I take this practice to the pavement, I feel as though I am growing in step with the Father and at a cadence my soul has been longing for. With worship playing, good shoes tied secure and a pace that brings beads of sweat, every bit of breeze that whisks my way feels like a kiss from above and even on hot days the sun beam’s embrace is like a hug from the Heavens. The only sounds I hear beyond the music is my imperfect pitch, bird song and my children playing.
This has consistently been the most beautiful part of my day…and yet each day I must choose to be proactive in this practice. If I give fatigue, busy schedules, hot temperatures, low energy or a thousand other reasons not to walk any stage time — I will never lace up my walking shoes. The longing to worship my Savior is met with a mirrored longing to rest, relax, curl up in a blanket, etc. And this my friends is by no mistake...
Pause for a moment and think of the wings of a butterfly. The beautiful patterns on one wing are mirrored on the other, but this mirroring means the patterns while identical do not point in the same direction. One winged pattern will lean to the left and its mirrored design will always lean to the right. This is clearly recognized on the butterfly because we can see the pattern with our own eyes…but what of the subtle patterns not seen with the eye? There is a pattern, one of push and pull that vies for your soul and this spiritual tug of war is one that can be easily missed until you train your mind to recognize what the eyes can’t.
To help with this visual I am going to use an actual butterfly wing, so if you are listening I would encourage you to pause and check out the diagram for visual purposes.
Throughout my life I have noticed where I feel pressed to do something good, be it for my health or for the sake of another, there seems to be a counter equivalent pull to not. When I have felt the need to sit and read my bible, soaking in truth, there seems to always be a perfectly timed distraction. When I hear words of encouragement from someone, there seems to be a weighted whisper that casts a shadow upon every thing they said. When the light in my soul presses me to be in step with my Father, darkness pulls for me to sit down and rest my feet.
I believe wholeheartedly that the enemy uses subtle tactics to keep us from walking with our Lord…it’s what he did in the garden and he still works in the same ways. He won’t use the same lines he delivered to Eve — no, that would be too obvious — instead he waits in the shadows and studies our patterns of behavior.
Patterns on a piece of paper are drawn with ink… behavioral patterns are formed from a combination of biological factors (genetics and brain chemistry), psychological factors (such as experiences, thoughts, and emotions), and sociocultural factors (including family, culture, and social norms). My friend if satan was able to quote scripture to Jesus (Matthew 4) then you better know darkness is well versed in the patterns that form your makeup. And when the patterns of behavior that would bring fruit in your life and glorify your Father are drawn, the enemy works to mirror the pattern in ways that will slowly overtime leave you barren and the glory leaning in darker camps.
So what do we do if darkness knows our patterns of behavior and how to trigger responses within the wellspring of our souls? We disrupt the pattern darkness is familiar with…we go against what pulls us towards flesh tendencies or the ways of this world and we make God the focus.
“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matthew 6:33
“You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13
“I love those who love me; And those who diligently seek me will find me.” Proverbs 8:17
When we make God the focus and not ourselves (aka our feelings, our opinions, our concerns, our comforts, etc) then our behavioral pattern will inevitably be impacted for the better because darkness can’t disrupt a pattern it’s never seen you practice.
Now be prepared though, because once you disrupt an unhealthy pattern, the battle isn’t over…it has just begun only this time you are aware of the spiritual tug of war being waged with every moment faced within a day.
When you feel the call to pray and then the pull to wait till later tugs — stop what you are doing and talk with your Father.
When you feel the call to worship and then the pull to save it for Sunday tugs— turn up the music and sing louder for your Father.
When you feel the call to read your Bible and then the pull to read a quick Psalm and be done tugs — read instead where Jesus spoke for even the enemy chose to quote a quick psalm when he tried to pull our Savior under (Matthew 4).
When you feel the call to reach for Jesus and then the pull to reach for something else, anything else, tugs — cry out to Jesus and trust Him as your Savior. The last thing satan wants is for you to believe who Jesus truly is.
So…it’s time to pick up the pen and break the patterns in your life that are subtly pulling you away from where God wants you. If you don’t know where He wants you…ask Him. Ask Him everyday, and then listen, watch, wait for Him to respond. He will but in His time. While you wait, draw near to Him daily and when you feel Him call you — and trust me you will if you are diligently seeking Him — then remember there will inevitably be a subtle or obvious pull in opposition. The pull will feel like a warm blanket to your heart…but remember the words of wisdom found in Proverbs 4:23
"Guard your heart with all diligence, for out of it flow the springs of life."
Guard your heart…give it a job and go for a walk with your Father. I can testify this works. Two weeks ago I was struggling with fear, anxious thoughts and self doubt, but ever since I began walking with my Father and worshipping Him, the fear has been replaced with hope…anxiety replaced with joy…and self doubt has been replaced with a royal robe, establishing my worth in the only eyes that truly matter.
The push and pull of spiritual warfare is often times subtle until you recognize the patterns. And the journey from where you sit now to beside still waters, begins when you awaken from your passive position and pursue God despite the pull darkness may try to force in hopes you will cave once more to the patterns it can predict.
"You shall walk in all the way that the Lord your God has commanded you, that you may live, and that it may go well with you, and that you may live long in the land that you shall possess”.Deuteronomy 5:33
"Thus says the Lord: 'Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls’”. Jeremiah 6:16
"Be imitators of God, therefore, as beloved children, and walk in love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us..." Ephesians 5:1-2
